Mommy I Never Told
by Hailey Bell
Summary: This is the revised version of the 1st M.I.N.T Cordelia is fighting with her mother, and who else but everyone's favorite neighborhood vampire gets the chance to help her?
1. Chapter 1

**Mommy I Never Told** (_2.0_)

This is a revised verson of the original story I posted. I think I have grown a little as a writer, and have **vamped **the story a little. I hope everyone likes it! -H.B

Disclaimer: I own nothing...if I did this show would still be on and everyone wouldn't have died, but anyway... the poem that inspired me to write this was Forgotten Child by _Jennifer J. Vasquez_.

Chapter One: **Sarcasm In My Voice**

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Cordelia walked out of her house. Today she couldn't take the constant bad-mouthing her mother gave her. She was complaining that Cordy didn't do well in school. Well, Cordy thought, that was probably because it had only started three weeks ago. Plus, to add to the Chase family drama, her parents decided that they hated each other tonight. 

"Why did you let them have a child? Come on, you must have seen them when they had me you should have killed me! They don't deserve a child, even one like me. Please, I don't want to live like this any more. Please, take it all away. Is that too much to ask to ask for?" Cordy was in tears by the time she stopped talking.

She stopped believing in God when her favorite aunt died. Then, of course she met Buffy, and now that she almost dies every other day praying God is an everyday occurrence for her now. This was the first time, though, she had talked to Him in her front yard, where the neighbors could hear.

"Why didn't you let me die the first time I was attacked by a demon? What did you think it was funny to watch me suffer? Like it was a punishment for how I treat others? I hate the way it is around here. I wish I die every time I see a vampire or demon come close to me. Is this what you want, for me to live the rest of my life in pain?" Almost as if answering her it began to rain. Not like normal, it poured. The thunder and lightening shook the houses slightly, and the trees swayed violently.

In the distance Cordelia could still hear her parents from inside their house. "Yeah, thanks. This makes my life so much better. You are my Savoir." She screamed towards the sky.

"Did you hear the hint of sarcasm in my voice?" As if to answer her, the loudest thunderbolt hit right after she had asked. "Yeah, I thought you did."

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Short I know, but I promise this is going to get better... please R and R! 


	2. Chapter 2

So this is the second chapter and I am glad to finally get this story back up and going again!

Chapter Two: The Front Yard Incident

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Cordelia started her day as usual, at Sunnydale High the center of all things evil, and that's not only the students. But she saw all the strange stares and glances that came her way, which was weird because she was the Queen C no one stared at her this way.

She then realized what was going on, the front yard incident, she remembered. Cordy should have known that someone living on her street would have heard her talking, and then told everyone they knew about it. Harmony and her friends tried to act normal, but who could after learning that Cordelia Chase was having 'family' problems. Cordy hated letting people into her family life, it made her feel so normal, like she was just like everyone else. When, in fact, she wasn't, she was captain of the cheerleading squad, and three time May queen. Mr. and Mrs. Chase were talked about when it involved money and shopping, never anything else. Even the teachers were acting nicer and more concerned about Cordelia. This was going to be the worst day of my life, she pitied herself as she walked to her locker to get her things after school.

"Cordy. Hey what's going on? Are you okay?" Buffy and Willow walked over to Cordelia's locker after school. Buffy looked genuinely concerned, so did Willow, but Cordy didn't care that much about how concerned they were. She didn't talk to them much since the 'Willow/Xander' thing.

"You know Buffy I was having a terrific day, then you had to come over here with the fake concern. I don't need you two to worry about me. Now, I am going to be late to cheerleading." Cordy looked at their faces. They were in full shock, which was surprising considering Cordy was always mean to them, but didn't want to talk about today or last night, she just wanted to get out of school.

Later that night she was planning on meeting some friends at the Bronze, but decided against it, and took a walk instead to clean her head. She was okay, she reassured herself, no one she knew would see her walking alone at night and if they did she would just ignore them, and play dumb tomorrow.

Then, like fate HE showed up, not the HE she was constantly arguing with, no the one with brooding brow and intense dark eyes, it made her sick, to think that a guy, dead or alive, would waste his time morning his 'love' Buffy, of all people.

"Hello Cordelia." Angel was never the most talkative person, she observed on occasion, but he knew when to be polite and keep it a simple greeting. She smiled at him for his effort to acknowledge her.

"Hi Angel. So what are you doing out here, looking for Buffy?" She asked stopping her walk when they had finally come to a comfortable distance, to stand and talk for a few moments. Her smiled grew larger when she noticed how uncomfortable he looked around her, then again he always looks uncomfortable, she reminded herself.

"No, I was just walking, thinking," was his simple answer. He looked down at the ground before looking at her again.

"Sure, don't you mean brooding?" She asked him nonchalantly. He graced her with a small laugh at her joke. "Don't worry I was doing the same thing. Do you want to walk and 'think' with me?" She was a little scared that he would say yes and then not talk the whole time, so she'd get very uncomfortable. Or he might kill her, but that was just her natural response around a vampire, and then he could say no, and that made her feel bad inside as well. It was almost as if he said no it means he didn't want to know her either, and that was like so many other people.

He noticed that she was waiting for his answer, so he turned to her with a small smile, the only one she's every seen. "Sure, I'd like the company, so how's school?" Her eyes lit up at his attempt at small talk.

"It's okay I guess. I have this examine in chemistry and it's going to take a lot of cramming to pass. I don't really pay that much attention in class. So I study a lot right before a big test." She laughed slightly at her own laziness. He nodded in understanding, he never really saw Cordelia focus on schoolwork, or any work for that matter.

They walked all over town talking about whatever came to mind at the time, then they made it back to Cordelia's house. She had actually enjoyed having Angel around to talk to, they seemed to have had a great time together. She was really surprised about how open he was with her, and how open she was with him. Cordy told him everything about what happened at school and at her house the day before, and he really listened. She liked talking to him, it made her feel wanted. He was a good listener, and a potentially good friend.

"Well thanks for walking me home, and listening to me. It must have been really boring for you." Cordy said as she moved onto her porch. She had noticed that when she stared telling him about how her mom had been nagging at her, he had taken her hand in a concerned nature. Surprising to both of them they walked the rest of the way holding hands. It was when she got up the steps that he had finally let go of her. It was a nice gesture that made her feel like he cared and was giving her the freedom to let everything out with no judgments.

"No, it was fun. If you ever want to talk again just come to the Mansion and we'll take another walk." He backed away form her porch a little. He felt like he had to tear himself away form her. "I'll see you soon, goodnight Cordelia." He turned and started down the street, again.

"'Night Angel." Cordelia whispered to herself, she felt like running after him, but held her place in front of her door. She supposed that small crush she had on him came back after tonight, but wouldn't let herself give into it. She turned and slowly opened the door to her family's home.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three: Are You Using Sarcasm

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Cordelia walked into the kitchen to get a snack before going to bed. She was amazed at how tired she had gotten from just walking for a few hours. As she bent down to get an orange from the bottom shelf of the refrigerator, her mother came barging in the kitchen door with the phone in her hand. Cordy looked up to see what she was going to do, but she didn't find out because her mom took one look at her, then walked right back out with a look of pure disgust on her face.

Cordelia knew that the teachers would have called to tell her parents about how she was mocked in school and that they wanted to know how she was. In her last period she even cried, because Harmony had been telling everyone that she was crazy and going to therapy. She hated it when teachers tried to help you out, but instead make it worse.

"Mom, I didn't want to tell you because I thought that you'd get worried and call the school or something and I know how much that would take time out of your busy life." Cordelia said calmly as she followed her mother out to the living room. She was trying to explain what was going on at school, without saying it was all her parents' fault.

"Are you using sarcasm with me young lady? You know it never ends well, when you try to be a smart-ass." Her mother said to her. He voice was low, almost a whisper, but Cordelia knew she had said the wrong thing once she looked her mother in the eye.

Diana Chase, Cordelia's mother, hated the thought that her daughter was, well Cordy believed, alive. Her mother gave Cordy what she deserved when she needed it. Like, for instants, right know. She started with simple timeouts when she was younger, but as the years progressed so did the punishments. Whenever her mother was made Cordy knew that there was going to be hell to pay. So she used a new tactic when talking to her mother, sadly it was almost begging, no pleading with her to calm down and listen to what Cordy had to say.

"Mom listen, I wasn't using sarcasm. I know better than that, and I know you have important things to do in the day. I never want to get in the way of that. Please, I promise I'll take care of it if you just give me the chance. Tomorrow there will be no phone calls and the teachers will think I was just having a bad cramping day, I swear."

"You'll take care of it?" Diana laughed a to herself. "I don't think so. I'm calling your teachers back right now and fixing it myself. You have to think about others when you have a bad day Cordelia, like how it looks on you family. We are looked up to in this town, your father and I worked hard to make it that way, and I don't want our spoiled daughter ruining it."

"Mom…" Cordy said softly, she was hurt by her mother's words, and she felt tears brim around her eyes, but Diana took no notice.

"I'll be up in your room in a little bit, and you better be there too, young lady. I can't believe you let them think you were having a bad life here, we give you everything you ask for. You just think you're so special and that you have this horrible life. You don't get starved do you, you have all the latest fashions styles don't you? Go to your room, and wait for me to get you." The tone of her voice was what scared Cordy the most, because she knew what was coming.

Cordy did as she was told and headed up the flight of stairs to her bedroom. She sat on her bed waiting for her mother, she thought it was so stupid of her to wait and do nothing to stop her mother's wrath, but then if she got caught it would only get worse. A part of her did want to leave, to run away to anywhere but here, but where could she go that her mother couldn't find her?

"Cordelia, dear. You know I love you and I only punish you to teach you to be a better person." Her mother said sweetly. She came quietly in to Cordelia's room. Cordy remembered how she always gave this 'love you, but I have to punish you' speech before she finally just hit her. Cordy knew this would need a lot of make up the next day to find her knew bruises from where her mother hit. Hopefully her mom would have some compassion and hit her where it was easy to cover with a little foundation. But it was unlikely, Cordy told herself, her mother never had any compassion towards her.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four: I Fell… That's Why

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The next day seemed to go on fine. No one talked about what happened yesterday, and Cordy had her friends back under her control. Harmony had a tough day, though, she had to deal with payback Cordelia Chase Style. But for Cordy it had turned out to be a really good day.

"Hey, Cordy, wait up." And it's over, Cordy thought to herself as Buffy and Willow came walking up to her, much like yesterday afternoon. "What happened yesterday? Xander told us you cried in your last class." That was it, she told herself, that little weasel was going to get it soon. Maybe a Prada heal up his ass, yeah she said to herself that would be nice.

"Yeah, I had a tough day, but that's over." Cordy really didn't want to be seen with these people, so she kept her explanation short and sweet. She pushed a piece of hair behind her ear to show that she rolled her eyes in the perfect Cordelia way, but she was forgetting why her hair was perfectly blocking her face. "Thanks for the concern, but I don't need it from the two of you. So, you can leave now."

"What happened to your eye?" Buffy asked. Cordy almost laughed out loud at the concern, it sounded too real to be coming from Buffy, but then she noticed that the shield she had made to cover up last nights injury was gone. "Did someone hit you?"

"Oh, that," She pointed to her eye, she had to think fast, and play it off as nothing. "No, I was walking down the hall and fell…that's why. The maid had just waxed the floors, and I wasn't being careful. I hit the corner of a bookshelf. It's not like you haven't had a black eye before. I'll be fine." Cordy couldn't believe that even through all the eye make up Buffy could still see the bruise. She guessed it was because in her line of work Buffy had to cover a lot of her bruises up too. Cordy knew that Buffy could see when someone covered something up, even a zit.

Right after school she went to Angel's to talk. She had to tell someone what happened last night and he was the first to come to her mind. She'd hoped he would be okay with her just coming over, because she didn't know how to get a hold of him other wise.

"Angel, are you here?" She was a little scared to come and just walk in, but it was Angel and he probably wouldn't hurt her, unless, of course, he decided to be the evil murderous vampire that likes to attack her on a daily basis.

"Cordelia? What are you doing here?" He was kind of confused to see her here. He didn't expect to talk to her again, but even if she did want to talk, he thought it would be when the sun was down, which meant they could go for a walk. He was a little nervous about her staying here, he knew she might be a bit uncomfortable, knowing that they would be alone.

"I'm sorry I didn't call first, but I didn't know your number, if you even have a number. I just really need someone to talk to. I'll leave if you have other things to do." Cordelia looked at him with her face full of worry. He could see that something was really bothering her, and he wanted to help the best her could.

"No, it's fine. I'm ready to listen, I'm here for you Cordelia." Angel said. He was really nervous having her here in his house, he didn't know what to say of do. But he told himself that it was just a sort visit, but he remembered how much fun he had had the night before on their walk. Once he had that in mind he relaxed a little.

They sat in his living room in front of a huge fireplace talking about what her mother had done the night before, and all the other times. He held her when she started to cry, even though it was a bold move for the both of them. She was glad that he was there to comfort her, she was starting to feel like he was the only person she could depend on to be there for her.

The time flew by and it was dark before they knew it. He had insisted on walking her home, and she accepted without that much of a protest. She decided that it would be nice to lighten the mood, so she brought up a subject they could both enjoy.

"Oh my God you will never believe what Xander said in history today." Cordy started laughing before she even told the whole story. She was glad to see that Angel had also found Xander Harris to be a complete idiot.

They started talking about what Xander had said, and how he had detention for the rest of the week, and then she branched off the other humorous things that had happened. Angel was really enjoying being with Cordelia, he liked the way she could always find something to make him laugh. She was nothing like he had expected her to be, before he actually got to know her. She was full of life, and had so many different personalities. He liked how she kept him guessing as to which she planned to change into next.

When they finally reached Cordelia's house, they sat on her porch for a while. It was a comfortable silence, nothing either of them had expected. It was nice just knowing that they weren't alone, and the other was there when needed. Cordelia made the mistake of looking at her watch, it was almost eleven o'clock, she was late for her curfew and she was going to get in to it with her mother about it if she caught her on the porch with Angel.

"Well this was fun. We talked all night. I didn't know you could handle conversations this long." Cordelia teased Angel. He stood and gave her a smile. She was glad she had told someone about what was going on with her, and that they cared about it. She finally felt wanted.

"Yeah, we can do it again tomorrow if you want, we can even go to the Bronze…" Angel decided to put the Bronze out there. He didn't really want to go, mostly because they couldn't talk there, but she was always there with her friends and he didn't want to make her feel like she couldn't still see them.

"That sounds like a plan. I'll see you tomorrow." Cordy was surprised by his offer, and she was glad to take it, but she knew that they would probably never make it to the Bronze, she wanted to keep him all to herself. If they went out it would risk them meeting Buffy and her friends, and Cordy wanted Angel to pay attention only to her. She thought it was strange to think like that, but it was how she felt.

They both stood on her porch now standing face to face. She looked at him straight faced for a little bit then she had to laugh. He looked at her and stared laughing too. He didn't know why, but seeing her with a smile on her face made him happy. He never wanted to see her crying or scared again.

"Okay, I have to go in now." She said to him as their laughs began to dissipate. She looked at him, and thought about what she should do next, and then she kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks, goodnight Angel." She whispered softly as she pulled away from him, and started walking into her house.

"Goodnight." He said. She could tell she had caught him off guard, but it felt like the right thing to do at the time.

Once she was up the stairs nearing her room, her nightmare began. She missed her curfew and her mother was waiting at her bedroom door. The last time she missed her curfew she had to spend tow days at home because she couldn't move, she was in so much pain. She didn't think tonight was going to be much different.

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Okay this is it for now! I hope this feeds all those reading...remember reviews always make the story move a little faster! H.B. 


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five: Daddy's Girl

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Cordelia had to be at her high school in less than thirty minutes. She had a game to practice for, and all the other cheerleaders were waiting on her. She only had time to throw on some gym shorts and a sports tank. She grabbed her gym bag and ran out of her room and out the front door. She was so focused on getting to practice that she didn't see whom she bumped into until it was too late. 

"Wow! Nice to see I was missed. Knocking over Dads the new 'fad'?" Cordy's dad, Michael, was standing in front of her holding her arms for support. She looked at him for a moment seeming as if she had never seen this person before, and then she threw her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek with all the love a daughter could give her father.

"Daddy I missed you so much! When did you get back?" she pulled away and looked up at her father. He didn't look his age really, she always thought of him as some sort of classic guy in those old detective movies in black and white. He was always in a hat and his hair was kind of graying, but he had the heart of a teenager.

"I just got in. Where are you going so early? Not to see any boy I hope." He joked with her. The last boyfriend that he had actually met was Xander and they had gotten along really well, which is also why none of her other boyfriends have never met her dad.

"No, I have to get to practice. I slept in, and… well it is going to look really bad if me, being the captain of the squad is late, so I have to go, but I'll see you later right?" She said walking over to her car. A part of her was worried that he would have to leave again.

"You know what I'll drive you to practice. I have to stop by the office anyway. And we can catch up on the way there, isn't, what do you say… a plus!" She laughed as her dad tried to use on of her common sayings. He was always trying to be cool for her, but he was still her embarrassing dad.

They talked all the way to the school. Cordy told him everything, excluding her mother's new habit, and they had enjoyed seeing each other. Things were starting to look up again. She was so glad that her dad didn't have to leave on another business trip. This one was one of the less convenient, because he and her mother had just finished a fight before he left, leaving her mother in a very sour mood.

"Okay, well here's your stop. Call me when you need a ride back. Have fun Kiddo." He father said as she got out of the car. She gave him a priceless smile and waved goodbye.

When Cordelia finally got to her cheerleading practice, she tried really hard not to get too sidetracked at the thought that her father was home now. This changed everything. I have to tell Angel, Cordy thought as she did a backhand spring, back tuck. She thought that it was a little funny that she immediately thought of Angel, but he had helped her a lot these passed days.

"Cor… are we going to keep practicing or is this over? I have a manicure in an hour." Harmony's voice brought Cordy out of her thoughts. "And the others have places to be, come on we nailed this routine."

"Yeah, go! It looks good, but we still have to make it better, but we can do that later. See you guys." The mood switch that had taken place in less than a day took Harmony and the other girls aback. Cordelia was happy and that's a lot better than the mood she had been in all week. They were al happy to have their best friend back.

Cordy had changed and relaxed when she got home later that day. She had spent sometime with her friends, and went with Harmony to get a manicure. She was in such a good mood, and planned to stay this way.

That night at dinner, Cordelia and her parents had sat in the dining room silently eating. It was a new change and it seemed to please everyone. Cordy's mom occasionally glared at her father from across the table, but other than that it was like a normal family eating dinner. Hopefully nothing would change, and go back to the way things were. Times were going to get better as long as Cordy's dad didn't have to go on another one of those long business trips. Cordy remembered one time that her mother had told her where her father goes on 'business trips'.

"Whores! That's why he leaves. Business my ass! You… I swear Cordelia Chase if you ever think that you can desert your family just to go to some foreign country and jump some young, hot thing I will disown you." Cordelia's mother scolded her one night when her father was in France.

Her mom had this notion that he never worked on his trips. It was understandable, what woman wouldn't worry about her husband thousand miles away? The thing was that Diana Chase would take all her insecurities out on her teenage daughter. Cordy knew her dad loved her, and would never leave her permanently, but he had work to do. Her mother was horrible to her dad, and they always found something to fight about.

Focusing back on the dinner in front of her, Cordelia, liked it that she wouldn't have to have another talk like that with her mom. It was painful for the both of them when Michael Chase decided to leave his wife and daughter Cordelia alone for possibly months at a time. Hopefully he wouldn't have to leave for a couple months, or maybe never. He could, with time, bring his family back together.

The next morning, Monday, Cordelia had a new sense of security. She wasn't afraid to be around people and hear what they had to say. She was back to her old ways. Today no one was making her feel bad about herself, but, instead, she was going to make the whole school bow at her feet. She was happy that she was feeling good enough to have a manicure done yesterday? Today she was putting the past behind her, and cut the loose ends and security blankets she didn't need anymore, starting with a curtain undead vampire.

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This is where I have to stop for the time being...sorry! I have a vacation coming up, and I don't think I can get the next chapter out before I leave! Again...sorry! H.B. 


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six: A Waste Of Space

I just have to add that I absolutely loved writing this chapter. It took me weeks to come up with it, and I think I did a pretty good job. Let me know what you think! Thanks for all the reviews... H.B.

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After school Cordelia decided to go see Angel and tell him the good news. She walked to the front door of the mansion, and knocked once before letting herself in. A part of her didn't want to talk to Angel, but she needed to tell him that she was thankful for what he had done for her, even if it was just understanding and listening. She was surprised to see that Angel was already by the door knowing that it was her.

"Cordelia! What… is something wrong?" He looked at her and saw that she looked really happy. So why would she be here? Sure he didn't mind her being here, but why would she need to talk to him if something wasn't wrong? "I thought you'd be out with your friends."

Cordelia stepped farther into the room. She couldn't help but notice that he was lacking a shirt. He must have been working out, she thought. Finally focusing back on their conversation she found her voice. "I'm sorry if I interrupted something. I promise I won't stay long. I just came to say that my dad finally came home. And I wanted thank you for all you've done, you know like not telling anyone…about my mom and all. I'm really glad that I had you here to listen to everything that has happened these last few days."

" You're welcome. So what did your father do when you told him?" He asked her. He noticed that her face was full of confusion. "About your mom?"

"Oh, that. Nothing happened. 'Cause I didn't tell him. She never does anything to me when my dad's home. They only fight with each other. So I'm sure I'm fine for a little while. She'll get over all this stuff soon." Cordelia said. She had a huge smile on her face, but Angel didn't seem too pleased with her answer.

"Cordelia I don't think that's any better than before. You're dad being home may stop her now, but what happens when he leaves again?" Cordelia stared at him blankly for a moment. Why was she having this conversation with him? He didn't know her family, he barely knew her. Now it all seemed so clear, she shouldn't have some to see him.

"Angel, please. He's not leaving me again. Besides you don't know what they're like. You have never met my parents."

Cordelia stared at him for a moment trying to read his expression. "Come on, Cordelia. You're turning this into some fairytale, the wicked witch doesn't always go away forever." Her smile faded when he said that. And he could tell that he upset her, but it had to be said. She wasn't looking at this rationally.

"What! Now my mom's a witch? Angel, she's not some supernatural thing you and your 'cry Buffy' girlfriend go around and kill all the time. She's a human, maybe not a very good one, but… she's my mother. I know she cares about me, and I don't care how many times she hits me, I will never let anyone hurt her." How could he say that to her? But then why did it sound right in the back of her mind when he'd said it? It must be some weird vampire thing, she thought to herself.

"Cordelia, it was just an expression. Look she needs help, and she won't stop hurting you until she gets some. You could get seriously hurt." He reached out for her arm, "Let's just sit…"

"Don't touch me!" She moved behind his big couch, trying to keep as much distance as possible. She didn't want him to touch her, it was as if he would make her believe him just by touching him. "God, you're loving this aren't you. Trying to be all high and mighty like God's freaking gift. Let me telling you something, you are the farthest thing from anything God would ever create." The words slipped out of her mouth and there was no way for her to take them back now. His expression went from hurt to anger as he looked over at her. She didn't want to say these things to him, but she had to get him to stop caring about her, and the best way seemed to be: hurt him first.

He couldn't believe that Cordelia was being so bitchy towards him. She was never like this with him ever. She was always trying to get him to like her and not Buffy. He had to talk some sense back into her, he just hoped she'd listen to him. "Okay listen, I just trying to help you. Obviously you don't want it, but that's too bad because you're the one that dragged me into this…" but he didn't get the chance to finish because Cordelia cut in.

"Oh, so now this is all my fault. I just walk right into my mother's fist, and I usher my dad to the airport every time he leaves. God listen to yourself you're starting to sound like…" it was Angel's turn to cut in.

"If you could shut up for two seconds I might be able to finish a sentence. What I was about to say was you dragged me into this and now I want to help you out, it's all for a friend." He hoped that now that she heard that he did it so they could be friends, then maybe she would listen to him, but by her expression he could tell it didn't work too well.

"That's sweet of you to take care of poor Cordy just to impress a 'friend'. Gee, you sure know how to make a girl feel special. Did she tell you about the eye and everything, with her pouty mouth all 'help her Angel please, while I go out and have a life." Angel was sure now that she had gotten the wrong idea entirely. He had to stop her before she got too out of control.

"Cordel…" but once again he didn't get to finish. Cordelia was on a roll and she wanted to get everything out in the open.

"No, it's your turn to listen to me finish. We're not friends Angel, and you're not my father or grandfather, God knows you're old enough to be, and I don't need you looking out for me. I just needed someone to talk to, and now I have this guy that sounds just like my mother half the time." She was so angry that she had tears brimming her eyes. Angel couldn't help the urge to go over and comfort her, but she was two steps ahead and moved farther away from him.

"You don't mean that Cordelia. I know you, and this isn't you. You're acting like that girl that everyone is afraid of and loathes, a vile bitch that gets her way. That's not the girl that I use to talk to. What happened to my girl, the one that makes me smile just by telling me about her day? That is the girl I love being with, please Cordelia." He hated it when she became that girl he avoided every time he went to the high school, or the Bronze. Cordelia was shutting him out, and he wasn't going to let her without a fight.

"What…when did…?" Cordelia couldn't think straight. He had thrown her off when he called he 'his'. She was beginning to let her guard down, but she drew in deep breathes to keep her mind on the reason she came here, and that was to get her old life back. She was going to be Queen C again, even if that meant killing anyone in her way.

He noticed her inner battle, and he knew that he had found a way to break her down, get her to open up again. "I want the Cordelia that walked with me all night, and the one that I would hold when she started to cry. I want the annoying on that would bounce up and down when I would give in and tell you something about my past. I want you…" he decided to leave the sentence unfinished because her facial expressions had not changed the way he had expected. Cordelia stood with her arms crossed over her chest and her gaze cast towards the floor. She loved hearing him say those things about her, but she wasn't going to give in.

She looked up with a deep anger in her eyes. She had to focus on what he just said, but she had to rip all the good out of it and read it completely wrong so she could continue to be mad at him. "So that's what I am to you? An annoying, pitiful, abused, cheerleader. I'm sorry Angel, but I won't let you, or anyone else think down on me. I can handle myself." Cordelia looked at him. She kept her gaze in his deep brown eyes, all she could see was the hurt that she was inflicting on him. She felt bad, but this is what she did everyday at school, what was the difference now?

"Cordelia that's no what I…" Angel started, but saw that same glint in her hazel eyes that he hated about her. It was that one thing that made him avoid her from the moment he met her, the arrogance that made her a pain in the ass. And he was tired of fighting her, "Fine! Yes, that is exactly what you are. And you keep coming everyday. Don't you think that I just might have something else to do? Something that is more important than your problems?" He let it all go. He was sick of her, and wanted nothing else than to get her out of his quiet home.

Cordelia was pissed off now. She didn't think he would go that low. He was actually trying to get her out now, but for the first time in her life she thought someone had beaten at her own game. She thought he was going to be the first to get her to stay, and he was the first one she wanted to stay for. "You have something better to do? Come on…" Cordelia was ready to dish out her worst, and knew that once all was said and done they were never going to get passed this. "Buffy doesn't are about you anymore and all her friends are afraid of you! You're dead to everyone around you, even me. Come on after last year's chaos, you really think any of us want to be around you? You tried to kill all of us!" Cordelia just let the words flow from her mouth, not even thinking about them anymore. Tact was dead to her as well.

"Well, they hate you too, but they're really the only people you've got, Cor." Angel couldn't believe she was being such a brat about everything he said, it was like she didn't want to hear what he had to say. And he was sick of her little games. She had Daddy to run home to now. "Those sheep you call your friends don't care about you, just how much money Daddy has in his bank account. Buffy and everyone else see you as a waste of time. They try so hard to let you in, but you just keep pulling back."

"I don't care. Haven't you figured that out yet? I don't need them. I have a beautiful body, flawless shin, money, and a pulse. I can do anything I want in this town, or any other really. But you know I know some aren't as lucky as me, and too bad. I don't care about anyone but me. But what about you? Huh… what exactly do you contribute to this fine city? You, Angel are a waste of space!" Cordelia said finally. She couldn't believe that she had said that to him. Sure she occasionally thought that, but with all the things had done for her in the last few days she never thought she would voice them. She tried to keep the tears out of her eyes. She meant her words, but they hurt him too much for her to stand. She wanted to say she was sorry, but that would defeat her purpose here.

Angel tried to keep his anger and sadness to himself, but he could tell she knew what her words did to him. He never thought that the Queen C could make him feel so useless. "Get out Cordelia!" He said to her through gritted teeth. She gave him a smug look as she turned and headed to the door.

"Gladly. You know I don't even remember why I bothered coming over here…" She said, turning to face him one last time. She tried to stall for herself. She wanted to say sorry and thought that if she stalled long enough she could bring herself to say it.

"Out! I thought I was helping a friend…" Angel said to himself, but Cordelia heard every word. Her eyes grew wide at the thought that he had only listened to her because someone asked him. She had two guesses as to who what someone was.

"Yeah, cause you've got loads of those! I wonder was it the pouting lips or the big puppy dog eyes that made you do it?" Cordelia shot at him. Her eyes were beginning to fill with tears, and she pulled the door open. He started to walk towards her, but didn't touch her. He could only look into her hurt eyes. That was one thing Cordelia couldn't hide: She poured her heart out in one glance of those beautiful hazel eyes. "I'm gone. Go brood to that friend of yours. Who ever she is…" She whispered thinking he was going to throw her out soon.

She slammed the door in his face, "You…" He whispered into it as he heard her slam her car door. He couldn't help but hear her sobbing as she walked away form him. Things had really gone form amazing to hell in the matter of days. He thought he was use to the hell part, that was all he knew for hundreds of years, but he missed the small light Cordelia brought with her. He missed her.


End file.
